~Taking a Character~

[TEH BIG BAD ADMINZ]

THIS IS A NO-APPLICATION ROLE PLAY!!!

But in order to be approved for play you must do one simple thing. Reply to this thread with an In Character post as the character you wish to play (must be chosen from the canon list!). We will only deny based on spelling, grammar, and competance. (Or if you are a Mary Sue/Gary Stu/What have you!) *Ahem* As this is a crack setting, character mastery isn't much of a concern.

Please fill out the form below, and post in reply to this thread!


TEH FORMZ FUR TEH BEINZ A CHARAKTUR:

Character Name:
Character Crack Twist: (the brackets after their name on the canon list)
IC POST: (2-3 Paragraphs please!)

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Your Name:
Your Age:
How Did You Find Us:



[b]Character Name:[/b]
[b]Character Crack Twist:[/b] (the brackets after their name on the canon list)
[b]IC POST:[/b] (2-3 Paragraphs please!)

[b]------------------[/b]

[b]Your Name:[/b]
[b]Your Age:[/b]
[b]How Did You Find Us:[/b]

[D'Anna of Amphipolis]

Character Name:D'Anna Biers
Character Crack Twist: (Xena: Warrior Princess)
IC POST: (2-3 Paragraphs please!)

"SHEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE-YAH!" D'Anna flipped through the air, hurtling downwards into a crowd of formally dressed dinner guests. The stairs which she had just leapt from overlooked the dining hall, which was just chock full of blondes.

Landing on her feet, D'Anna's eyes darted about wildly, trying to find the one she wanted. Dashing off after a short and petite blonde woman, she reached out grabbing the girl's shoulder and spinning her about. "Gotcha!" She said with a satisfied smile, only to have her expression fall when it was not in fact her long lost Gabrielle. Snarling, she shoved the woman aside and took hold of the Chakram at her waist.

"ALRIGHT ALL OF YOU ON THE FLOOR!" She called out, pulling her arm back and throwing the metal ring with all she was worth. Instead of ricocheting off the walls like it should have, the ring traveled a few feet and fell to the ground with a thud. Smiling sheepishly at the now very angry crowd, the blonde Xena woman ran forward, retrieving her might Chakram, and did a succession of back flips all the way out of the room.

Maybe her sidekick was on a different deck.

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Your Name:Dee
Your Age:21
How Did You Find Us:PBS

[Dr. Happy Pants House]

Character Name: Dr. Gregory House, aka: Mr. Happy Pants
Character Crack Twist: Sensitive support-group leader who is not afraid to cry.... *dies laughing*
IC POST:
With his clipboard in hand and his cane in the other, Dr. Gregory House was a man on a mission. With the little gathering of people in the common area, he was surprised to see a few more people gathered then the previous day's meeting and it made him inwardly smile as he hobbled his way to the center of the room, while they all seemed to be lost in chatter. Tapping his cane on one of the chair, the sound struck through the air, bringing their attention on to him.

"Good afternoon everyone, if you would please sit and let me explain today's exercises, we can begin," he told them, motioning to the rest of the chairs that were unoccupied. As they did, he took his own seat, flipping open his folder.

"Now yesterday we did the one on one talk sessions. Today we're gonna have a bit more fun than that... Trust falls." He said looking up around him. "I want you to go up to the person that is directly across from you and partner up. Once you're done, we'll begin."

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Your Name: Jade
Your Age: 21
How Did You Find Us: Meg's is my pimp

[Lady Cuddles]

Character Name:Lisa Cuddy
Character Crack Twist: Dominatrix-PympDaddy Daddy Mommy.
IC POST: (2-3 Paragraphs please!)

Stepping into the room with enough grace and poise to put both Audrey Hepburn, and Marylin Monroe turn green with envy in their stuffy little graves, Lady Cuddles arrived on deck. Glancing to each side of her, scoping out the male population, she strolled forward with an easy, and seductive smile. She wore a thick and luxurious fur coat, which she soon shrugged off, leaving her in only a skin tight, and very, very short black leather tube dress.

With complimenting spike stillettos that came to her knees, and black lace gloves that rose past her elbows, Lady Cuddles sat at the bar, crossing her legs and ordered a drink. Winking flirtatiously at the boy serving, her she let her gaze wash out over the crowds. There were so many lovely young ladies here, yes, she had only to find her future employees, and then they would be in business.

Sipping casually at her martini, she stood and made her way into the crowd, hoping to get at least two, if not three men on her payroll tonight.

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Your Name:El-Cee (Elsie) or L-C.
Your Age:19
How Did You Find Us:Ad

[Benjamin the Bunny Man]

Character Name: Benjamin Linus
Character Crack Twist: Bunny man
IC POST: (2-3 Paragraphs please!)

Taking his seat in the reception area with all the rest, Benjamin Linus gently picked up his rabbit cage and withdrew its occupant, a white bunny with a black number 8 painted on its back. He ruffled its fur as he scanned his surroundings with suspicion. "Hush now, Tom Tom," he cooed to the animal, stroking it. "Don't be afraid. The nice people won't hurt you. They wouldn't dare."

This would have sounded threatening, if there had been anyone nearby to hear it. But there wasn't, so Ben continued to fondle the bunny undisturbed, sizing up his fellow passengers as though they were competition of some sort. And in a way, they were. All of them, each and every one, could easily get ahold of his rabbit-breeding secrets and sell them to his industry rivals. He wasn't about to let that happen.

In fact, Ben was fully prepared to kill them if need be. It would be the work of a moment to gas out the entire ship, leaving himself and Tom Tom the only two with gas masks, the only two to survive.

Or, he thought wistfully, as he spotted the swish of golden hair and the accompanying bunny cage of his biggest opposition, Anya Jenkins... maybe there could be three survivors. Maybe.

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Your Name: Tonlio
Your Age: 18
How Did You Find Us: You're kidding, right?

[Captain Tightpants-Hammer]

Character Name: Mal Reynolds
Character Crack Twist: (split personality: Captain Hammer)
IC POST: (2-3 Paragraphs please!)

Walking into the dining hall, taking in the sight of all the wealthy, privileged folk going about their daily meal, Mal let out a weary sigh. The last time he'd eaten had been back on his ship, Serenity, and it had only been a chunk of protein which, while healthy, all in all wasn't even a mite tasty or filling. And yet these people got to dine on the finest cuisine the 'verse had to offer, each and every day. That did not strike Malcolm Reynolds as fair.

Of course, normally he'd be content just to let the rich about their business whilst he went about his, but today he was on the job. One of these folk had something very valuable, something Mal didn't know the nature of but which Fanty and Mingo seemed to hold in very high regard. And when that high regard translated into lots and lots of coin for Mal, well, generally he did the work without too much askin' why.

Pulling his antique gun out of its holster, he fired two warning shots straight up into the air -- the ship's flimsy glass skylight dinged a couple times as the forcefield nabbed the bullets -- and shouted, "Now that I got your attention, folks, which one o' you goes by the name'a McAllister?"

There were screams and whimpers, but a distinct shortage of answers to his question. He raised his gun again. "Don't make me ask y'all twice, now! He's got some property that's of interest to me, so if he don't want this here altercation turnin' into a massacre real quick, he best step forward--"

That's as far as Mal got before everything went black.

"Never fear, fair citizens!" announced the famous hero Captain Hammer, arriving on the scene -- oddly enough via the floor, but there was no time to think about that now. People were in trouble. Possibly people with camera phones who could report his thrilling heroics to the local news! "Captain Hammer's here to save you and your little...kiddies and...handbags with dogs in them and things." He held up his fists. "Now, where's the bad guy, so I can beat him up with my enormous strength? It's Dr Horrible, isn't it? I should've known!"

Captain Hammer glanced around for his arch-nemesis, wondering vaguely why the diners were all giving him such weird looks. Didn't they know a hero when they saw one?

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Your Name: just Mal is fine
Your Age: 18
How Did You Find Us: PBS

[Boone Carlyle]

Character Name: Boone Carlyle
Character Crack Twist: French maid
IC POST:
Pulling his nylon stockings on, Boone glanced up at the clock radio in his tiny, cramped cabin. Ten a.m. He was late by a half hour. Great. Captain Vincent was gonna have his head for this, that was for sure; for a labrador, the Captain ran a tight ship. Put a foot wrong and you were fired. Out of a cannon. Into space.

He was firm but fair. Without the fair part.

Making sure his frilly, white apron was tied straight and snatching his feather duster up off the nightstand, Boone swept from the room in a flurry of skirts and lace and rushed down the hall to the elevator. He just managed to squeeze through the doors as they slid shut -- because naturally, being a cloud of black smoke, the other occupant of the elevator could do nothing to hold them open. Maybe. Or maybe he just hadn't wanted to. Boone had never trusted Smokerson, despite the butler's obvious crippling deformities.

Jabbing the button for the entrance level, Boone clasped the duster in front of him and whistled nonchalantly, as he watched the floors rush by first vertically, then horizontally, then diagonally... and then stopped looking because he was giving himself a headache.

With a pleasant little ding, the doors slid open once more, revealing a crowd of passengers ready to be greeted. Boone just hoped that none of them would get drunk, mistake him for a girl and pinch him on the backside this time. He didn't think he could take it for five cruises in a row.

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Your Name: BB
Your Age: 17
How Did You Find Us: An ad

[Andrew, Slayer of the Vampyrs]

Character Name: Andrew Wells
Character Crack Twist: thinks he's a Slayer and others are vampires
IC POST: (2-3 Paragraphs please!)

Nobly pulling his red coat around himself, the brave warrior made his way up the gangplank and onto the interstellar cruise ship, ready for any dangers that might await him. It was cold that night and the wind was cruel, but Andrew Wells, Slayer of the Vampyrs, had a job to do. He firmly set his jaw, feeling the reassuring weight of stakes, battleaxes and other weapons in his duffel bag as he eyed the other interstellar passengers.

Unfortunately for the young Slayer, vampyrs had a job to do, too. The entryway was full of the beasts, milling about, no doubt waiting for a hapless victim to stumble aboard so that they could feed. Well, Andrew, Slayer of the Vampyrs, was not about to let that happen.

Dashing toward the nearest creature, a female, Andrew withdrew a stake from his jacket pocket, ready to strike and turn the vampyr to dust. But just as he made his heroic leap, his sneakers caught on each other and he stumbled, falling flat on his face and spilling his arsenal of anti-hellspawn weaponry out onto the floor. Through his pain, he just managed to spot the high-heeled shoes of the she-monster skittering away. "Ow," he groaned. "And ooh. Gucci."

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Your Name: >.>
Your Age: 18
How Did You Find Us: Ad

[TEH BIG BAD ADMINZ]

ALL YOU GUYS ARE ACCEPTED. HOORAY!

[Lorne]

Character Name: Lorne
Character Crack Twist: Rogue Demon Hunter!
IC POST: (2-3 Paragraphs please!)

Okay, so the Holodecks had been a bad idea.

And turning the 'Danger' setting up to eleven? An even worse idea.

And deciding that he didn't need weapons, because surely he could defeat holographic monsters with his bare hands? Well, you get where this is going.

Lorne was sprawled out on the floor of the Holodeck, his cunning hat-and-sunglasses disguise strewn carelessly somewhere in front of him by the earlier assault, while a purple, monkey-like demon hologram jumped up and down on his back. For something fabricated, gosh it felt real. He was gonna ache in the morning.

If he could escape by then, without any of his fellow shipgoers seeing him disguiseless -- Lorne was a renowed demon hunter (at least he thought so), and it wouldn't do for people to see his decidedly...demon-esque visage. Sure, he knew that his green skin and horns were merely a birth defect thing, but other people would think otherwise. They'd think that he himself, famous rogue demon hunter, was some kind of...of demon! He'd be ruined!

So he'd just have to find his own way out of this mess. Somehow.

"Hey, Donkey Kong? I don't suppose I could tempt you with a sea breeze..."

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Your Name: Tonezz
Your Age: 18
How Did You Find Us: lolololol

[Gaius Baltar]

Character Name: Dr. Gaius Baltar
Character Crack Twist: Gaius Baltar
IC POST:

"I really must protest!" Baltar tried to keep up with Six's long, graceful strides that seemed to propel her faster than any human.

When she didn't respond Baltar cleared his throat rather rudely as he finally managed to match her speed never really knowing if she slowed on purpose just so he could catch up and he wasn't going to apologize for the reason why Six's beautiful, angel like features suddenly looked so hideous. "Was it something that I have done?" Baltar's face contorted with sound confusion while his eyes took on that lost look.

He quickly hid his moment of weakness with a nervous nod at a passing Cylon strolling past them. The humming red light was becoming an ever pounding sound in Baltar's brain like that one furious migraine that would never go away. "For the love of the gods, Caprica, answer me!" Still, Six pressed on in silence striding her long legs as if trying to get rid of the man. Suddenly Caprica whipped around so suddenly Baltar nearly jumped out of his skin as he came to such a quick stop his eyes grew wide. He felt Caprica's hand gripping his shoulders and her lips batted something fierce inches from his face. He couldn't hear the words he was meant to hear.

Baltar seemed to drift away with the moment. He tried to read the disturbingly innocent hue in Caprica's eyes. "I have nothing for you to gain." Baltar said cutting off her strain of furious words. A tear streaked down the cheek of Baltar's cheek like the new drop of spring. He pulled away from her grip of his own accord and shuffled miserably past her his shoulders slightly hunched as if he were exahusted. The droning, monotonous life sign of two centurians as they clanked into view cutting off Baltar's slow escape from Caprica's scorn. Baltar almost immediately turned around to see Caprica's face had once transfored to the gentle look that Baltar grew to love.

"I have no immediate intention of being.... riddled with rapid machine gun fire from..." Baltar looked unsuredly over his shoulder at the two stationary centurians. "From these two lovely walking harbinger's of humanity's unfortunate sudden demise. However, when I said I have nothing you to gain, well, I didn't quite mean that. At all, really. You see I am the one thing standing between war on a galactic scale." Baltar found himself slowly walking back towards Caprica as if she were waiting with open arms to hide him from the centurians. Her scorn still emnated from her stunning looks. Baltar found himself keeping his eyes on the centurians over his shoulder. Baltar felt like a fool. He passed Caprica and immediately the centurians clanked past.

Baltar found himself hugging the wall to avoid the slightest of touches with the toasters. Her words made him quickly look back at her, all thought of what just happend had eluded him. "What did you mean by that?" Baltar questioned sadly yet curiously as Six started to walk away again. "I will heal all of your pain. Gaius."

Baltar watched her for a confusing minute. "Wait.. what?" Baltar ran to catch up. Caught in her web yet again.

Outside; the Cylon fleet pressed on into the unknown and further away from Baltar's people into a delicate, intricately woven thread of confusion.

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Your Name: Applesauce
Your Age: 19
How Did You Find Us: Advertisement

[Lindsey McDonald]

Character Name: Lindsey McDonald
Character Crack Twist: Texan florist/wannabe serial killer with an evil hand.
IC POST: (2-3 Paragraphs please!)

Clipping the last rose stem and delicately arranging the flower in its proper place, Lindsey smiled in satisfaction. There was nothing better than a perfect bouquet, and this was it. His masterpiece. Some lucky bride would walk down the aisle with this on her wedding day and have Lindsey McDonald, florist, to thank for the envious looks the bridesmaids gave her. Well, that and the fact that she had a husband.

How could he have ever contemplated becoming a lawyer? It seemed ridiculous now, a silly childish notion of the past. So what if he'd been top of his class at law school, offered a prestigious internship by Wolfram and Hart? Flowers were where it was really at. That and killing people.

Setting the new bouquet down gently on a display, Lindsey heard the familiar tinkling bell that signaled a customer's arrival. Smiling even broader still, he trotted over to the woman who'd entered, rubbing his hands together. "Well howdy, ma'am, how can I help you? We got every kinda flower y'could ever want, and fair prices besides." But before she could open her mouth to answer, somebody's hand lashed out, grabbing her around the throat with a grip like a vice. She goggled at him, and Lindsey looked down to see...

"Aw hell," he sighed as the woman gasped and choked. "I'm real sorry about this, ma'am. Stop it, evil hand! Now, stop that!"

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Your Name: BB
Your Age: 17
How Did You Find Us: an ad

[Hoban "W-Dawg" Washburne]

Character Name: Hoban "W-Dawg" Washburne
Character Crack Twist: (failed and in-denial pymp daddy; rival to D-Day)
IC POST: (2-3 Paragraphs please!)

Oh yeahhh, everything was comin' up W-Dawg today. He'd won himself, and his skanky ho Zoe, a place on board this fancy cruise ship, where there was bound to be all the honeys he could ever want. Wash had restricted himself to just the one so far, because he didn't want to get a big head or anything, he was a modest pymp daddy, he didn't need a harem like all those other, show-off pymp daddies... Like that D-Day guy... But now he felt like he ought to branch out. Maybe get a second skanky ho, one for each arm, sorta thing.

Whipping off his feathered fedora and smoothing down his hair, W-Dawg appraised the fine selection of honeys on deck, putting on his most charming 'you know you want some' expression. There was no way they could resist him. He was W-Dawg Washburne, and therefore irresistible.

"Ladies," he announced, spreading his arms wide and giving them all a big wink. "Who wants a piece of W-Dawg? Not to fret, there's plenty to go around. Although if you wanna fight over me, I'm sure we can find some mud someplace."

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Your Name: ...*jumps out window*
Your Age: 18
How Did You Find Us: An ad on PBS

[Special Agent Wilson]

Character Name: Special Agent James Wilson
Character Crack Twist: (the brackets after their name on the canon list) extremely incompetent hitman
IC POST: (2-3 Paragraphs please!)

The name was Wilson. James Wilson.

Wilson decided to take this opportunity to put on his sunglasses. He always put on his sunglasses whenever he thought about his name. It was so perfect, just like James Bond's!

"GODDAMN THESE CIA GLASSES!" he cursed as they got caught on his pocket. Muttering to himself, he finally dislodged them from his pants, before donning them expertly. Now, that was more like it!

"Er, not that I'm from the CIA, haha, ha, ha," he called, glancing around nervously. Good. No one was here. No real damage done.

"Reverse psychology, lol!" he added for good measure.

Now, back to the mission on hand. Wilson turned to look down the dark hallway he was in. Why was everything so dark?

Right, sunglasses.

He took them off, folding them up and putting them back into his pocket, then squinted. Why was it so bright? Maybe he was better off with the glasses anyway.

Suddenly, he heard footsteps coming from the room on the far end of the hallway. He pulled out his gun. This was his moment, his chance, his...

"I wanna be, the very best, that no one ever was... to catch them is my real test, to train them is my cause!"

"CURSES! FOILED AGAIN!" Wilson shouted as he scrabbled to silence his phone. "GODDAMNIT CELL PHONE, WHAT PART OF 'SILENT MODE' DO YOU NOT UNDERSTAND?"

His phone was off, but it was too late now. The damage of those stupid, irrevocably inane cell phones had blown his cover. He was done for. The most he could do now was to go out with a bang, like they did in the movies.

Hunching down, Wilson locked his gun, and waited.

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Your Name: Special Agent Dora reverse psychology lol!
Your Age: Nine... ty four
How Did You Find Us: Special agent government search thing that you can't even know the existence of because it's top top sekkrit

[Hugo]

Character Name: Hugo "Hurley" Reyes
Character Crack Twist: Thinks he is King Arthur
IC POST:

"Come Patsy!" Hugo shouts out. He begins skipping down an empty hallway with two hollowed out halves of a coconut banging together to simulate the sound of a horse galloping. He stops and looks behind to see no Patsy. "Where could thoust have gone?!" Frantically he starts skipping back the way he came in search of his loyal servant Patsy.

He stops at the first door he comes across. He attempts to dismount the horse that he was never on. He bangs on the door and waits for a response. "Yeah? Who is it?"

Hugo then sticks out his chest and speaks, "I am Arthur! King of the Britians! Defeater of the Saxons! I have travelled..."

"What the hell do you want?" A man on the other side of door yells.

"Uh... well... I'm looking for my most loyal servant Patsy. Have thou seen him?" Hugo waits for a response.

"What? Get the **** out of here!" The man yells.

"If you do not open up and tell me where Patsy is, I shall take thee castle by force!" Hugo proudly declares.

The man opens the door angrily with a baseball bat and starts swinging at Hugo. He hits him a couple times as Hugo attempts to put out his arms to defend himself and move away. "Run away! Run away!" He starts shouting as he runs back a couple feet and mounts his non-existent horse and skips away banging his coconut halves together.

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Your Name: Preston
Your Age: 18
How Did You Find Us: PBS